My brother used to tell me whether or not girls he was dating passed the "porch test". The "porch test" consisted of whether or not he thought they as a couple could hold a conversation after everything was stripped away, and they were in the 80's sitting on their porch, watching the world go by. I think my brother was on to something. He wanted to be with some one that he could talk to and know.
In Val Farmer's book, To Have and To Hold, he lists a series of questions to know about your significant other. Part of what makes marriage enjoyable is if you are living life together. Marriage can be an absolute blast if you are married to your friend. Knowing that when someone annoys you , you can come home and tell your spouse about it, and they will encourage you. Knowing that if you are depressed, all you have to do is ask and they will hold you until you fall asleep. Seven years into my marriage and there still are many nights where my husband and I will stay up late talking about our dreams and hopes for the future. I cherish these moments. If you are dating seriously or married make it a point to know the questions below about your partner at any point in time. Knowing these things about your partner on an ongoing basis is part of how you will continue to feel connected.
1. Who is my partner's favorite people?
2. What stress is my partner currently facing?
3. Who has irritated my partner lately?
4. What are my partner's life dreams?
5. What are my partner's religious beliefs?
6. What is my partner's basic view on life?
7. Who are the relatives my partner likes the least and most?
8. What are my partner's current aspirations or goals?
9. What would my partner do if they won the lottery?